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 WARNING!! DO NOT OPEN THIS THREAD! [AGES 18+ ONLY!]

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PostSubject: WARNING!! DO NOT OPEN THIS THREAD! [AGES 18+ ONLY!]   WARNING!! DO NOT OPEN THIS THREAD! [AGES 18+ ONLY!] EmptySun May 13, 2012 1:42 pm

THIS THREAD IS NOT A JOKE.
Sex can help you give a great speech

Before you get carried away, we are not suggesting you hop into bed with your boss or sleep with the entire audience. However, having sex can help ease those all too familiar and very dreaded pre-speech nerves. This theory was developed by the psychologist Stuart Brody, who asked 22 women and 22 men to keep sex diaries about their bedroom antics. The group of men and women then had to undertake stressful tasks, like public speaking and mental arithmetic tests. Brody found that the couples who had had penetrative sex were less stressed and their blood pressure levels returned to normal at more speed that the others. Sadly though, those who “did it” alone did not reap the calming benefits, so buddy up before your next big speech.

The Victorians were filthy

Researchers at the University of Leeds believe that humans kiss to inoculate. Women who catch cytomegalovirus typically cannot carry a baby to term. However, if women are exposed to the virus in small doses then they become inoculated. And how can you inoculate against the virus? Why, through swapping saliva of course. Therefore, the brain boxes at the University of Leeds have concluded that we don’t jump into bed with each other straightaway because if we did we might infect women. Therefore we kiss to protect women from catching cytomegalovirus. So pucker up and stay healthy by smooching.

Giving oral is as good as the gym

Sadly girls, giving oral will only benefit you if you’re the giver not the taker. A study has found that pleasuring a guy and swallowing can lower women’s blood pressure and reduce their risk of getting pre-eclampsia. However, if you don’t have the stomach to tackle your man’s area in this way there are other ways you can lower your blood pressure. Another study found that having regular sex with a partner you lived with could lower your diastolic blood pressure, whilst another study found a link between cuddling and reduced blood pressure. So, although you shouldn’t give up on the gym altogether, ladies, it might be worth swapping your sports kit for something a little slinkier once in a while.

Sperm is a great face cream

Although it’s not a great idea to bottle your man stuff and give it to your girl as a present, it turns out that sperm contains protein, which if applied to the face has the same anti-wrinkle benefits as moisturising creams. Apparently the white stuff can tighten skin and give you a little surgery-free facelift. Interestingly, this isn’t the only benefit sperm has to offer. It also contains zinc, magnesium, calcium, potassium and fructose. Plus, if you’re still not convinced that sperm is super, a recent study in Albany found that women who had sex without condoms had fewer signs of depression than women who used condoms or did not have sex at all. cheers dance

WARNING!! DO NOT OPEN THIS THREAD! [AGES 18+ ONLY!] RB76849666666
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